Woken up, (yet again) to the familiar sight of empty bottles, clothes astrewn across the floor, and the garlicy wreak of a 4am questionable doner kebab lingering? Heck, maybe you've even woken up with a strange mexican man at the other end of the bed. Eitherway, you're probably feeling confused, queasy, and basically like you want to die (be it of shame or otherwise).
So, how to avoid this next time? Let's face it, we're students, and in spite of that declaration that you will "never drink again", undoubtedly you will find yourself in the middle of the SU Bar 2 days later, insistant that you're just popping in for a "cheeky pint". And queue the vicious circle of liver abuse once more.
So read ahead, and arm yourself with the student's guide to surviving a night out in Bournemouth - and hopefully you won't end up atAA...
So, it's 6pm, and we've all decided we want to go out tonight. What to do first?!
Thankfully, and most of all, conveniantly for us students, our halls of residence are but a mere stonesthrow away from Asda, andTesco Express. So stock up on booze. Probably not the most moderate way of beginning a night, but either way you're going to end up drinking, so you may as well get some on the cheap. Don't be that person that turns up to pre-drinks empty handed also. Noone likes a scrounger. While you're raiding the isles, pick up some munch- the least you can do to apologise to the abuse your body is about to suffer is give it a "final meal" beforehand. Drinking on an empty stomach is like attempting to drive blindfolded- you won't last long, and it's guaranteed to end in disaster.
Everyone's suggesting drinking games...?
If you've endured almost a years worth of the glorified student lifestyle, and you are yet to hear of the infamous "ring of fire"...then well done, bookworm....but seriously!?? Have you actually survived this far locked away in your room in the dark with a book over your head?!
Drinking games are an inevitability upon arrival to any flat/house party or general pre-drinks. But don't get carried away. The rapid rate at which your body is consuming alcohol is likely to make you surpass the tipsy stage- even the sheer drunken stage- and before you know it you're passed out in the corner before your nights barely even began. So pace yourself. Drinking spirits? Make themeasures smaller. Perhaps once one drink is finished, make the next one a tipple-free version? Noone is gonna notice a fingerful of vodka missing from your glass, but they're sure as hell bound to if you're puking up in the middle of their living room. Typical, eh?
We're trying to decide which club to head out to- But there's so many! How to decide?
Let your wallet guide you. Or to put it more simply- go wherevers cheap. The vast majority of Bournemouth's clubs hold special student promotional night's with offers on selected drinks. Not only is this going to put your student loan through less of a potential bashing, but ensure you don't end up looking a bit weird in the middle of a deserted club. The following is a basic guide for any timetabling rookies...
Monday: V/ Kukui
Tuesday: Toast at Bliss
Wednesday: The infamous Fuzzy logic at Lava Ignite
Thursday: Chilli White/ Kukui
Friday: Lollipop at The Old Firestation
(I'm missing out Saturdays and Sundays, even the slackiest of students need to revise and recover at some point)
It's so busy in here! How am I going to last 4 hours in this place?
Carry on drinking at the rate you probably have been at pre-drinks (despite my best advice) and you, quite simply, won't. So don't succumb to the immediate pull of the Bar as soon as you step foot in the damn place. The queues are likely to leave you waiting impatiently for a good half hour during this entry period anyway, and no one wants to waste crucial bust-a-move time.
Safety in numbers is also another point. No matter how appealing it is to bugger off for 10 minutes to talk to that really cute guy at the other end of the bar, you can guarantee the moment you go to reunite yourself with your mates, they won't be there. Same goes for anyone going to the toilet by themselves, to the bar by themselves, or generally moving anything more than 3 metre radius away from their collective group of revellers. Attempts to phone them will be futile, they'll either be a) too drunk to notice their mobile going off, b) It'll be too noisy for them too even hear it going off, or 3), sod's law will ensure you have no signal. And you probably won't find them for the rest of the night, especially if you're at Lava, with 4 different areas split over 3 floors. Eeek. We've all got thatfriend that always wanders off on a night out haven't we...?
2am lag is kicking in. How do I make it another hour?!
Not surprisingly, it's 2am, and your poor withered body has thus far coped with numerous alcohol units, hours of dodgy bumping and grinding, and you're a tad battered and bruised after falling over onto your ass in the middle of the dance floor (which you willmaintain was courtesy of those 4 inch heels and not those last 5 Jagerbombs) But this is the home-stretch, hang in there!
Water. Water is your friend. Down as much as possible, rehydrate yourself, and best of all, it won't cost you a penny. Bye-bye death-breath...
Sit down. Have a rest. This isn't to condone a 20 minute nap upon the realisation that sofa's in clubs can be surprisingly comfortable. But your feet will thank you in endless amounts to give them a little break.
And hey, if you're feeling really tired, just go home! I've learnt that the next day, you usually only remember the last couple of hours of the night before, so if your last couple of hours you're feeling like the grim reaper, forget your bravado and call it quits!
3.30am. Kicking out time, and definately home time. But I can barely remember my name, let along where I live...?!
This is yet another stage of the night where men will have the upper hand. Clad in footwear not possessing any kind of deathly heel, in our opinion you're practically fit to run a marathon. So guys, be prepared to become a human-donkey service and have ladies demanding piggy-backs. Never walk home by yourself, you'll undoubtedly end up lost and stranded, and find yourself in a vulnerable position, prey to any nasties about. Failing this, and in the unlikey event that you actually have some money left, order a taxi. But for God's sakes, don't get into one by yourself. If the recent tragic murder of Joanna Yeates taught us anything, it was this. I'm not denying that Bournemouth is a lovely, safe place to live. But there are some strange characters about, just as in other place in the world- so it's better to be safe. Plus purely from a paupers point of view, shared taxi's = shared fares. Ka-ching.
Finally made my way back to the flat! Result. What last-minute tricks can I use to sober up and avoid tomorrows hangover?
Lucky enough to live outside a fast food joint? Brilliant. A hearty, carb-based meal will soak up the majority of that lovely cocktail of various drinks sloshing away merrily in your stomach. But a golden rule: If you wouldn't eat it when sober, then you probably shouldn't eat it when drunk. E.g.- Subway, good, doner kebab with extra everything...bad. Very very bad.
If upon your arrival back home sweet home you shall be indulging in a little home dining, make sure you have a designated Chef-overseer. And by this I mean, the slightly less inebriated friend that makes sure you don't slice your hand whlst opening various packets and tins (I've done this, and it hurts a LOT) shamelessly pinch food from your flatmates freezer stash, or fall asleep while yourchicken dippers are grilling away in the oven (again, done this, and I can honestly say that 6am boulders of charcoal aren't so appealing).
Forget the food, I've pulled! How do I end up not regretting this?
So many teens have said that they'd be more likely to sleep with someone when drunk they wouldn't normally when sober. Beer goggles can make the spottiest, greasiest creep seem a total lothario, and make you act in the spur of the moment (basically snogging off greasy face of said creep). End up back at their flat? I wouldn't advise taking things too quickly,but que sera, we are students so the worst will inevitably happen. The only advice I can give is to always use protection, no matter how awkward it seems. Ending up with a nasty STI, or even pregnant, and boy, you'll feel a whole lot more awkward. In the event of emergency, the morning after pillis available from many pharmacies for around £25, or free from Family planning clinics or your Doctor.
It's the next morning. How to I stop this constant urge to be sick!?
Should've read these tips before hand, idiot. Drink some water, eat some toast, have a Berocca and wallow in self-pity in front of theiplayer for the rest of the day.
With any luck, these few tips will bode useful on your next night out. Oh, and just a few golden rules: Don't do drugs, don't talk to murders, and in the wise words of Coach Carr a la Mean Girls... "Don't have sex. Cos you will get pregnant. And die". So kids, whatever you do, don't forget your condoms.
Irresponsible drinking isn't big or clever (although it can be pretty damn funny) Visit www.drinkaware.co.uk
So, how to avoid this next time? Let's face it, we're students, and in spite of that declaration that you will "never drink again", undoubtedly you will find yourself in the middle of the SU Bar 2 days later, insistant that you're just popping in for a "cheeky pint". And queue the vicious circle of liver abuse once more.
So read ahead, and arm yourself with the student's guide to surviving a night out in Bournemouth - and hopefully you won't end up atAA...
So, it's 6pm, and we've all decided we want to go out tonight. What to do first?!
Thankfully, and most of all, conveniantly for us students, our halls of residence are but a mere stonesthrow away from Asda, andTesco Express. So stock up on booze. Probably not the most moderate way of beginning a night, but either way you're going to end up drinking, so you may as well get some on the cheap. Don't be that person that turns up to pre-drinks empty handed also. Noone likes a scrounger. While you're raiding the isles, pick up some munch- the least you can do to apologise to the abuse your body is about to suffer is give it a "final meal" beforehand. Drinking on an empty stomach is like attempting to drive blindfolded- you won't last long, and it's guaranteed to end in disaster.
Everyone's suggesting drinking games...?
If you've endured almost a years worth of the glorified student lifestyle, and you are yet to hear of the infamous "ring of fire"...then well done, bookworm....but seriously!?? Have you actually survived this far locked away in your room in the dark with a book over your head?!
Drinking games are an inevitability upon arrival to any flat/house party or general pre-drinks. But don't get carried away. The rapid rate at which your body is consuming alcohol is likely to make you surpass the tipsy stage- even the sheer drunken stage- and before you know it you're passed out in the corner before your nights barely even began. So pace yourself. Drinking spirits? Make themeasures smaller. Perhaps once one drink is finished, make the next one a tipple-free version? Noone is gonna notice a fingerful of vodka missing from your glass, but they're sure as hell bound to if you're puking up in the middle of their living room. Typical, eh?
We're trying to decide which club to head out to- But there's so many! How to decide?
Let your wallet guide you. Or to put it more simply- go wherevers cheap. The vast majority of Bournemouth's clubs hold special student promotional night's with offers on selected drinks. Not only is this going to put your student loan through less of a potential bashing, but ensure you don't end up looking a bit weird in the middle of a deserted club. The following is a basic guide for any timetabling rookies...
Monday: V/ Kukui
Tuesday: Toast at Bliss
Wednesday: The infamous Fuzzy logic at Lava Ignite
Thursday: Chilli White/ Kukui
Friday: Lollipop at The Old Firestation
(I'm missing out Saturdays and Sundays, even the slackiest of students need to revise and recover at some point)
It's so busy in here! How am I going to last 4 hours in this place?
Carry on drinking at the rate you probably have been at pre-drinks (despite my best advice) and you, quite simply, won't. So don't succumb to the immediate pull of the Bar as soon as you step foot in the damn place. The queues are likely to leave you waiting impatiently for a good half hour during this entry period anyway, and no one wants to waste crucial bust-a-move time.
Safety in numbers is also another point. No matter how appealing it is to bugger off for 10 minutes to talk to that really cute guy at the other end of the bar, you can guarantee the moment you go to reunite yourself with your mates, they won't be there. Same goes for anyone going to the toilet by themselves, to the bar by themselves, or generally moving anything more than 3 metre radius away from their collective group of revellers. Attempts to phone them will be futile, they'll either be a) too drunk to notice their mobile going off, b) It'll be too noisy for them too even hear it going off, or 3), sod's law will ensure you have no signal. And you probably won't find them for the rest of the night, especially if you're at Lava, with 4 different areas split over 3 floors. Eeek. We've all got thatfriend that always wanders off on a night out haven't we...?
2am lag is kicking in. How do I make it another hour?!
Not surprisingly, it's 2am, and your poor withered body has thus far coped with numerous alcohol units, hours of dodgy bumping and grinding, and you're a tad battered and bruised after falling over onto your ass in the middle of the dance floor (which you willmaintain was courtesy of those 4 inch heels and not those last 5 Jagerbombs) But this is the home-stretch, hang in there!
Water. Water is your friend. Down as much as possible, rehydrate yourself, and best of all, it won't cost you a penny. Bye-bye death-breath...
Sit down. Have a rest. This isn't to condone a 20 minute nap upon the realisation that sofa's in clubs can be surprisingly comfortable. But your feet will thank you in endless amounts to give them a little break.
And hey, if you're feeling really tired, just go home! I've learnt that the next day, you usually only remember the last couple of hours of the night before, so if your last couple of hours you're feeling like the grim reaper, forget your bravado and call it quits!
3.30am. Kicking out time, and definately home time. But I can barely remember my name, let along where I live...?!
This is yet another stage of the night where men will have the upper hand. Clad in footwear not possessing any kind of deathly heel, in our opinion you're practically fit to run a marathon. So guys, be prepared to become a human-donkey service and have ladies demanding piggy-backs. Never walk home by yourself, you'll undoubtedly end up lost and stranded, and find yourself in a vulnerable position, prey to any nasties about. Failing this, and in the unlikey event that you actually have some money left, order a taxi. But for God's sakes, don't get into one by yourself. If the recent tragic murder of Joanna Yeates taught us anything, it was this. I'm not denying that Bournemouth is a lovely, safe place to live. But there are some strange characters about, just as in other place in the world- so it's better to be safe. Plus purely from a paupers point of view, shared taxi's = shared fares. Ka-ching.
Finally made my way back to the flat! Result. What last-minute tricks can I use to sober up and avoid tomorrows hangover?
Lucky enough to live outside a fast food joint? Brilliant. A hearty, carb-based meal will soak up the majority of that lovely cocktail of various drinks sloshing away merrily in your stomach. But a golden rule: If you wouldn't eat it when sober, then you probably shouldn't eat it when drunk. E.g.- Subway, good, doner kebab with extra everything...bad. Very very bad.
If upon your arrival back home sweet home you shall be indulging in a little home dining, make sure you have a designated Chef-overseer. And by this I mean, the slightly less inebriated friend that makes sure you don't slice your hand whlst opening various packets and tins (I've done this, and it hurts a LOT) shamelessly pinch food from your flatmates freezer stash, or fall asleep while yourchicken dippers are grilling away in the oven (again, done this, and I can honestly say that 6am boulders of charcoal aren't so appealing).
Forget the food, I've pulled! How do I end up not regretting this?
So many teens have said that they'd be more likely to sleep with someone when drunk they wouldn't normally when sober. Beer goggles can make the spottiest, greasiest creep seem a total lothario, and make you act in the spur of the moment (basically snogging off greasy face of said creep). End up back at their flat? I wouldn't advise taking things too quickly,but que sera, we are students so the worst will inevitably happen. The only advice I can give is to always use protection, no matter how awkward it seems. Ending up with a nasty STI, or even pregnant, and boy, you'll feel a whole lot more awkward. In the event of emergency, the morning after pillis available from many pharmacies for around £25, or free from Family planning clinics or your Doctor.
It's the next morning. How to I stop this constant urge to be sick!?
Should've read these tips before hand, idiot. Drink some water, eat some toast, have a Berocca and wallow in self-pity in front of theiplayer for the rest of the day.
With any luck, these few tips will bode useful on your next night out. Oh, and just a few golden rules: Don't do drugs, don't talk to murders, and in the wise words of Coach Carr a la Mean Girls... "Don't have sex. Cos you will get pregnant. And die". So kids, whatever you do, don't forget your condoms.
Irresponsible drinking isn't big or clever (although it can be pretty damn funny) Visit www.drinkaware.co.uk
